Category: creativity

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Hold That Thought-Emotional regulation and control in the contemporary classroom

Emotions. Crisis. Trauma.

Human beings with real feelings. Real dilemmas, issues, lives.

Teachers and students.

Waves. Sometimes waves upon waves.

Highs and lows. Undertows.

Hold that thought.

Grab your board and let’s ride while we chat.

We know that Social Emotional Learning, Mindfulness, Mental Health is something all of us need to work on. And I say all, because even as adults, we are not necessarily the best at identifying, regulating and speaking our truths and we’re at our own places on the journey and this must be respected.

We have programs we can work with, many of them fabulous resources which helped us lead kids to awareness and empathy. But…

If we know this is important work, why are we simultaneously alluding to the fact that teachers must needs always be these Mary Poppins like robots of calmness, zen like and stalwart in the face of all, “managing” and directing the class at all costs?

Hold that thought.

Someone needs us.

It’s the middle of class and a student from one of your other classes is outside your door, shaking, breathing irregularly, tears threatening.

They need you.

Now.

Yes, it’s “inconvenient”. Yes, your job is to teach the students in your class. Yes, you’re not a _____ fill in the blank. I honestly can’t count how many times over the years I’ve had to switch gears on the fly. Address the class to keep the work going, in such a way it respects the dignity of the student(s) outside, call the office, guidance, whoever I can get in touch with immediately, and out my door I go. To sit on the floor, sometimes hold some hands, talking, slowly, calmly, quietly talking, breathing if need be, telling my own story about anxiety attacks, letting them know it’s ok, we can get through this, breathe and breathe again, until it subsides and support arrives. Sometimes, the others will take over my class while I do this work, other times, we’ve gotten through it and they are ok to move to a different space. Regardless, we ride the waves until the waters calm and we can paddle back to shore.

But, you said we shouldn’t be models of control and calmness, zen and stalwart. Which is it? I need to manage my classroom and my students. I can’t be taking breaks for this; it’s not my…

When we ride the waves, we can get tossed about, we can get sucked into the undertow. Sometimes we absolutely must be a calming centre in a tempest especially when dealing with a crisis, or trauma, or someone else’s anxiety attack.

And my kids, they get it because I model, model, model.

It’s when classroom or emotional “management” takes precedence, classroom management and academics timelines take over the teachable moments, like bulwarks they stop the natural flow of things and we lose out on what could be defining moments for our students to learn core skills that help with relationships, team work, mental health, empathy.

Sometimes the point of the lesson is that we need to change direction; we must go where the students are taking us, to meet them as them as they are, where they are and this includes emotionally.

From my modelling this, my students learn that emotions are ok. We all have them. They learn to be empathetic not judgemental. They learn that if they too are riding the waves, there are safe harbours. They don’t question, judge or look askance when another student comes in, sets up camp beside my desk on the floor, pulls out art supplies, ear buds and just starts to create. They know from experience that my space is a safe space where, when they can’t cope, regulate, function, they can work on other class work here, or work through their emotions using whatever materials I have on hand.

But that’s chaotic! What about their other classes? I can’t be responsible for other students? What will their teachers say? They need to be in class learning.

Hold that thought.

How much learning do you think will happen when a student is not regulating? Sometimes, they can’t even articulate which emotions they are feeling.

They. Just. Feel.

This is where your relationships with your colleagues come into play.

Call their teacher (rule #1) and let them know where their student landed.

Call guidance etc. to let them know what’s going on with that student.

Chances are, had they not landed with you, they would be out of the building, most likely for the rest of the day, self medicating, possible self harming, definitely not learning.

If they’re not being disruptive (rule #2), then they are safe, and you are providing them with an opportunity to work things through, and you are modelling to others that processing is normal depending where each student is on their journey.

But that takes so much time! It’s disruptive. It’s not fair to the students in my class. I don’t have time and you still haven’t explained your criticism of “Mary Poppins” perfect teachers. This is too overwhelming!

Hold that thought.

Here’s the deal and my perspective.

Emotions are real and everyone has them. We need to make time, to role model what we expect students to learn from programs or packages. We need to walk our talk, not just show them a video or read some slides. We need to be real and authentic about our emotions. We can’t just suppress all the time, put up false fronts of placid professionalism because what does that look like and what do they learn?

Perhaps it’s because the students I work with are older, perhaps it’s the relationships I build with them.

They know I am calm in the storm, the bounce in the groove, and I am authentically me.

Contrary to some recommendations, I will name my emotions.

I am…frustrated, sad, joyful, amazed, bewildered, angry, tired, happy, overwhelmed.

They hear it and they see it because I’ve called it directly, in my outside voice, and they respect and honour that honesty and vulnerability, because then they learn it is safe to have emotions and how to name our emotions.

But we can’t go around being angry, or crying, or upset because that will have a negative impact on the emotions of our students! We need to buffer their emotions so that things don’t get out of control. A teacher must always be in control of themselves! A teacher must always be in control and manage the emotions of students!

Hold that thought.

Yes. And no.

It’s the what comes next that’s important. When they hear me name it, then they see me role model what I do with it.

They learn that maybe I need to take a minute to breathe and recenter. Maybe I need to laugh so hard tears roll out my eyes. Maybe I need to shed tears of joy, or sadness, to let them know just how very much I care and they affect me.

They see it. They understand it and itt gives them strategies and tools.

Yale’s Centre for Emotional Intelligence created a program called RULER. “RULER is an acronym that stands for the five skills of emotional intelligence: recognizing, understanding, labeling, expressing and regulating emotions.”

It is built in to the every day of the school environment such that it helps students and staff navigate emotions.

Some have called this emotional labour.

Hold that thought.

I call it an emotional investment.

Sometimes we just need to – Stop. Listen. Ask questions. Name your own emotions. Be vulnerable about ourselves. Role model, make suggestions for ways to change directions if needed.

When we do so, kids see us learning to deal with our fears, our hopes, disappointments and frustrations. We model learning (sometimes, when we’re not so lost in our socratic superiority). Why not model emotions? Model naming it. Model strategies. Model getting help. Model apologies. When you build this base then you can…

Hold that thought

Help.

Be there for.

Set the groundwork.

Kids in crisis. Kids who have experienced trauma. Kid who are experiencing depression/anxiety. Kids look to us for guidance, for themselves, for their friends.

I’ve handed more kids canvases and sketchbooks and told them to take your brain off that train, whatever that needs to look like. Anxiety, depression, trauma, the need to self medicate, self harm…put it into music, on the canvas, into words.

And when we model real, authentic emotions, we give them license to feel, to name their emotions, to work through them. And sometimes, it makes all the difference between one step. One fatal step.

I’ve cried. In front of a student (and my VP). A student who was near and dear started slipping. I knew something was off, but couldn’t put my finger on it. I asked them to name it.

Depression.

Severe depression.

Scale of 1-10?

9.

I had given the class something to work on, called admin and had taken it into the hall. There I discovered cutting, slashing and suicide ideation- to the extent they knew the how, but hadn’t gotten things together, just “thoughts”.

I started to cry.

Sitting there in the hall, holding their hands and feeling those words rain down like hammer blows to my heart, the tears dripping down my face, I named my emotions: great love, pride in their accomplishments, overwhelming sadness, pain at the thought of possibly losing such a phenomenal human being from my life, and determination, that together we were doing to get help to help figure this out.

Did it make a difference? I don’t know. But I knew that at that moment, at that time, that heart needed to know my heart.

In my 25 or so years of doing this, I have never regretted naming emotions, building those relationships and riding those waves.

My only regrets are the ones I have missed.

Hold that thought.

I am not you and you are not me and we’re all going to work as we are comfortable.

Furthermore, we cannot do this work without supports. We all need supports, our teams of professionals, our personal supports because heart song work can kick your ass and drain you as much as it is some of the most joyous life affirming thing you might do. Secondary trauma is a very real, and potentially debilitating thing. Always make sure that you take care of yourself after dealing with any crisis or trauma.

My final question to you?

When you are presented with that opportunity to connect and do the heart song work, what can you do a little bit differently to make those connections, model emotions and how you deal with them, such that your students will feel safe, supported and heard?

It’s an investment. It’s a journey.

Mental…Hold That thought

Mental, mental health, mentality…

A lot of “mental” and much of it

Conflated

Misused

A lot of times

Weaponized

Abused.

Hold That Thought.

Mental:

  1. relating to the mind.”mental faculties”synonyms:intellectual, cerebral, brain, rational, psychological, cognitive, abstract, conceptual, theoretical; More
  2. 2. relating to disorders of the mind.”a mental hospital”synonyms:psychiatric, psychogenic”mental illness”

I’ll be frank. I don’t like the phrase “Mental Health” or “Mental Illness”…”Mental” anything. Reminds me too much of the term “mental patient” with its images of straight jackets, unkempt physical appearance, desperate eyes or drooling, zoned out, over medicated lobotomized caricatures. We need to do better.

“But, we don’t have those kind of stigmas anymore! We have mental health days and posters and…”

Hold That Thought

We do. It’s a start. Programs create awareness in an attempt to teach and destigmatize, but it still “others” those who are experiencing mental health issues.

Truth is, whether adult or child, we still (historically and today) tie mental health issues to competencies and efficacy in terms of how we function in our personal lives, professional lives, family lives, school lives.

Loonies, loony bins, psych wards, psychos, disturbed, the crazy aunt, hugged secrets and stories of shame, people who disappear for a”rest”…whack job, fucking nuts, psycho, on her period, buddy’s lost it, couldn’t cope, what the hell is wrong with you, get over it, aren’t you done with that yet, didn’t the meds fix that, why are you always so tired, you off again, why didn’t you get your assignment done this time, what do you mean you can’t present in front of class, everybody can do that, ok, so you’re a little blue, you can push through that…

Hold That Thought

Some information quoted directly from CMHA (Canadian Mental Health Association), Bolding and italics are mine.

____________________________________________________________

Fast Facts about Mental Illness

Who is affected?

  • Mental illness indirectly affects all Canadians at some time through a family member, friend or colleague.
  • In any given year, 1 in 5 people in Canada will personally experience a mental health problem or illness.
  • Mental illness affects people of all ages, education, income levels, and cultures.
  • Approximately 8% of adults will experience major depression at some time in their lives.
  • About 1% of Canadians will experience bipolar disorder (or “manic depression”).

How common is it?

  • By age 40, about 50% of the population will have or have had a mental illness.
  • Schizophrenia affects 1% of the Canadian population.
  • Anxiety disorders affect 5% of the household population, causing mild to severe impairment.
  • Suicide accounts for 24% of all deaths among 15-24 year olds and 16% among 25-44 year olds.
  • Suicide is one of the leading causes of death in both men and women from adolescence to middle age.
  • The mortality rate due to suicide among men is four times the rate among women.

What causes it?

  • A complex interplay of genetic, biological, personality and environmental factors causes mental illnesses.
  • Almost one half (49%) of those who feel they have suffered from depression or anxiety have never gone to see a doctor about this problem.
  • Stigma or discrimination attached to mental illnesses presents a serious barrier, not only to diagnosis and treatment but also to acceptance in the community.
  • Mental illnesses can be treated effectively.

How does it impact youth?

  • It is estimated that 10-20% of Canadian youth are affected by a mental illness or disorder – the single most disabling group of disorders worldwide.
  • Today, approximately 5% of male youth and 12% of female youth, age 12 to 19, have experienced a major depressive episode.
  • The total number of 12-19 year olds in Canada at risk for developing depression is a staggering 3.2 million.
  • Once depression is recognized, help can make a difference for 80% of people who are affected, allowing them to get back to their regular activities.
  • Mental illness is increasingly threatening the lives of our children; with Canada’s youth suicide rate the third highest in the industrialized world.
  • Suicide is among the leading causes of death in 15-24 year old Canadians, second only to accidents; 4,000 people die prematurely each year by suicide.
  • Schizophrenia is youth’s greatest disabler as it strikes most often in the 16 to 30 year age group, affecting an estimated one person in 100.
  • Surpassed only by injuries, mental disorders in youth are ranked as the second highest hospital care expenditure in Canada.
  • In Canada, only 1 out of 5 children who need mental health services receives them.

____________________________________________________________

Unfortunately, those stats are related to the 2013 studies and surveys. If anything, the numbers are low and do not reflect the current data. The newer trend in schools right now is that intervention, targeted education programs are needed at much younger ages with school programs lowering the target age for messaging and strategies to 7-10 year olds from 12-15 year olds.

Adult or child access to effective, ongoing therapy or care is extremely challenging, even with supplementary insurance. Wait lists are long, and unless someone (including children) is in “crisis” and proves to be at risk for self harm or harming someone else, there is absolutely nothing one can do other that negotiate the ever expanding wait times. Basic therapy. Psychiatrists who specialize? Professionals who come to the home to help de-sensitize child with anxiety to get them out of the house? Good luck. Let me know when you find unicorns too please.

Children as young as 4 or 5 have expressed anxiety and depression and suicide ideation. One mother who wanted to spread awareness of the fact that very young children can indeed experience severe anxiety and depression, interviewed on 1010 radio said her daughter didn’t know the words to say “kill myself”. Instead, she said she wanted to “be with the angels“. How many callers jumped on the bad parenting, you’re just creating that dynamic for your child, another nutter damagingly their child, rather than critically looking at the hard cold truth that this is an issue for everyone, and age is irrelevant. Childhood anxiety and depression sometimes seems to come from out of the blue and can railroad a previously engaged, excelling student or athlete. Days, weeks, months of school can be lost, families are stressed as it affects everyone within that world. Factor in, kids (and adults) who start self medicating to alleviate the pain and distress, those who quietly self harm and conceal. This isn’t even tapping into those students who conceal so well, they fawn/fix/false front so that you would never know the struggles/battles that are internalized.

How are we as educators supporting these students? Do we have sufficient training to recognize symptoms, behaviours? Do we have relationships with these students such that we can have conversations? What supports, safety networks do our schools have in place? What accommodations policies do our schools/classrooms have in place to facilitate their capacity to learn separate from the health issues? Because a student with mental health issues is indeed capable, what that might look like is an entirely different matter. What supports are in place for the educators who do this work? Secondary trauma is a real “thing”. Dealing with crisis scenarios, working with students who are cutting, self medicating, at risk of suicidal ideation, panic attacks is intense and takes a toll on those working with them no matter how professional or grounded you are. What support/safety network is in place for your own emotional and mental well being?

Hold That Thought.

And speaking of teachers…what about the adults in the room? You read just one set of data. That potentially means that roughly (give or take because older data and I don’t know the ages of all my readers) 50% of us have experienced or are contending with mental health concerns.

And yet…so many of us do not disclose that we are going through these things.

Why?

From discussions with others and in my own experience, too often mental health is equated to professional and personal competency. We TALK about let’s talk about it, but only in the most superficial way, and with the unspoken caveat, as long as it is not disruptive, doesn’t last long, and doesn’t interfere with our relationships (personal or professional).

What would other people think? What would other people say? How will this reflect on how I do my job in the classroom?

It’s the fear of those comments, ” You know, you just HAVE to convince yourself you need to get out of bed every day; it’s really that simple”. “Aren’t you done with that yet? How long has it been? Surely here must be something they can do to fix it! You know, my aunt…” ” You just need to meditate, mindfulness, read positive things all day, go for a walk, do some yoga, play some sports, get out more, tell yourself you can DO it”. “Wellllll, I don’t know how she thinks she’s gonna continue to work, I mean if she can’t handle kindergarten how is she going to do this?” “There are soooo many other people who really want a job without having to deal with their absences”. “You get accommodations for THAT? Nice gig, how do I get that one?” ” You just need to grit everybody else does! My life isn’t perfect, but I don’t let it fall apart like that, that’s just playing the martyr, the victim, the drama queen”.

Hold That Thought.

And yes, I’ve heard these comments from people, both on here in variations and in real life. If that’s the attitude people are facing, why on earth would they want to disclose? Many celebrities have been talking more in the hopes of bringing a sense or normalcy to the issue, using their celebrity status to amplify awareness that people are not alone. Educators, however do not have the luxury of a massive fan base to fall back on and for some, job stability in terms of performative assessments skewed by conflating mental health and professional competency is an actual concern. So, people ” suck it up” and suffer in silence, unable to build their own safety nets and support systems, living a double life if you will, which in turn only serves to compound the root issues.

Furthermore, if this is how we discuss our colleagues, how are we relating with our students in classes? How are our own internalized biases being broadcast to those kids who need more than anything support and understanding? What double sided messaging are we giving them? On the one hand, “Let’s Talk About it”, “Mental Health Matters”, for a trendy day, or two or three. But there are no magical mystical wave a magic wands and done. Are we changing our expectations to meet students where they are, as they are? Are we accommodating mental health issues just as we would with an IEP, via differentiated assessment, extended timelines, not presenting in class, presenting with support? Are we punishing students for being late, absent, under the influence, not participating, expressing behaviours when we should be looking deeper, trying harder to understand the root causes and supporting our students to be the best they can be, as they are, where they are on their journeys, knowing the this can go backwards, sideways, full circle, full stop…knowing they are NOT doing this on purpose, knowing some days they just CAN”T!

Hold That Thought

We need to shift more. We need to actuate not just ideate and edu-blather about support and understanding that aligns nicely with “special days”. We need to be mindful. Of how our relentless positivity pumping affects others, those who are experiencing mental health concerns and those who knows some who is, and that the journeys are not easy. Positivity is a good thing, but wielding it like a panacea for everything weaponizes it and is debilitating to those struggling just to get out of bed, take a step out the door, interact with others. We need to stop looking side-eyed and talking in hushed tones about our students, friends and colleagues. If you can’t be truly supportive then shut the hell up and sit your ass down. Strong words? Perhaps, but seriously until you give your head a shake and learn some actual empathy and compassion, not just the buzzwords you keep eud-positively spewing; there is no place for your holier than thou, soul sucking drivel.

Hold that Thought

Training, support, comprehensive programs embedded into the curriculum, our policies and assessment strategies. How much training have we put into place to educate teachers on strategies to support students, both in crisis (panic attacks, suicide ideation, self harm, self medicating) and those who may be sliding under the radar, those who are missing substantial amounts of school due to ongoing struggles.

Hold that Thought

More conversations, yes. But more than that, we need to move beyond the positive feel good messaging into action that supports not only people on a mental health journey, but also the educators and facilitators who work with us.

Hold That Thought

I am an educator, facilitator, “werewolf whisperer”, advocate, artist, boy mom, fur baby mom, kayaking, former musher and a bunch of other stuff.

I am a survivor.

I have C-PTSD.

I am not my diagnosis and you better be ready to bring it if you mistakenly believe you can just place me in that box and shut the lid.

Hold That Thought

To be continued…

Hold that thought- journey from pedagogy to practice

I’ve been quiet on the writing front for a while. Sometimes my brain is a bundle of energy and thoughts that are intertwining and leap frogging of their own volition from one point to another, back, forward, sideways, somersaulting through cognitive dissonance and a processing system that baffles even me.

I’ve been journeying, riding the waves on the pedagogical ocean, gathering threads of learning and unlearning, unravelling the snarled knots of possibilities, laying the threads flat to begin weaving a tapestry of vision.

Hold that thought.

No, I mean literally, hold on because there’s a wave coming.

Phew…ok, now where was… seriously? Big breath and…

Gaaaaa….wheezing…ok…breathe…

I was talking about visions and tapestries and Twitter…

Yes, Twitter…here, have a towel and grab a seat.

Twitter is a most fascinating place. It’s lead me down rabbit holes of learning to finding a myriad of people across the globe, one connection leading to the next, creating a network of people who are doing amazing work in areas and on issues, people who have been phenomenal resources and sounding boards for my learning, prompting me to refine and define my personal philosophies and pedagogies, solidifying some, while re-evaluating and discarding others.

Twitter, and Edu-twitter is a vast ocean of knowledge just waiting to be explored and…

Hold that thought.

Quick! Grab those water wings!

That was the “love your students all they need is love and understanding and acceptance and if we only just believe in them and believe in us we will save each and every child and they will all go on to do great things because each child matters and I believe in each child who will in turn believe in themselves no matter their life circumstances they will find the grit within and be that shining star go team go” wave.

I think it hits the beach around the stand that has the candy apples, cotton candy and stuffed unicorns you can win if you pick up a trinket or two.

Hold that thought.

…and hang on…maybe try the life jacket, because this one is coming in hard with multiple breakers!

Whew!

Yes, yes, I should have warned you quicker. Well, it’s not totally my fault as these ones rise up and pile on, one after the other once a new topic starts trending. That was the ” we need to produce magical creatures who are creative, innovative, critical thinkers, empathetic, equity savvy, non passive drivers, creators and masters of their own learning, who meet global competencies and testing standards, know their passions and move on them, who will be ready for business, industry and tech careers of the future” wave.

No, I haven’t met…well, I’m sure they exist because everybody says so.

Hold that thought.

Yes, I see it and it’s a doozy! Head for the docks if you please, grab a safety buddy!!!

It’s the “Teachers MUST build a classroom that is Relationship based, with Culturally Responsive pedagogy imbued with SEL/Mindfullness so that it is Empathetic, Inclusive, Trauma Informed with Restorative Practices, has Flexible Seating , incorporates Student Voice/Choice via Co-creates Outcomes thereby Empowering students, uses STEM, STEAM based on PBL, UDL, and trauma-informed and let’s toss equity in there” wave.

No, I did not make that up. Honestly, there are tons more in other waves.

Yeah, it is kind of challenging to stay afloat. Mind the undertows and seagulls.

Let’s get an ice cream, grab the kayak and toodle around some calmer waters for perspective. Sometimes, it’s a good thing to sit with things while touring the streams and side channels, allowing for processing and reflection, where the waves of pedantic pedogocial pundits, the demigodery of didactic delineation, and the echo chambers of self congratulatory ego stroking don’t overwhelm reflective, critical contemplation.

You enjoy your ice cream and I’ll explain as we paddle along. Ok, I’ll paddle.

Over the past few months, I’ve been on a journey on the ocean, travelled round, rode the waves and learned a lot. There are a lot of things out there that resonate with me. I like PBL cross-curriculum learning. I like #STEAM, the arts, movement. I know that Sel/Mindfulness and being trauma informed is critical to the work I do, and I’ve always been a proponent of student voice.

There are amazing people doing fantabulous things out there that inspire me. In the waves and the echo chambers you can find these fireflies of phenomenal things, if you know where to look and get past the noise and pounding surf. There are chats and books and posts and threads talking about it all. But what I realized once landing on the quiet, tree-lined, rocky lake shoreline, is we’re really good about touting the ‘right” answers. Just like our kids, we can really callback what the “teacher” wants to hear (in this case the audiences in our various Twitter worlds).

No, that was a loon, not a seagull.

Hold that thought.

We need to dig deeper. We need to look at things with a critical eye to sift through what’s hype and what’s sound, what’s slogan and what’s being put into practice, how does everything connect and how are people doing that.

I love an amazing motivational speaker any day of the week (especially Wednesdays thanks), and sometimes we all need the feel good, lift me up.

Hold that thought.

If we are so confident in our opinions, theories, edifications, and they’re not just egocentric pontifications for the basis of self glorification in the echo chambers, then critical discourse, review of pedagogical applications and connections must be the next step.

Hold that thought.

How? But? What about? There’s this? Also that? And what will they?

Ok, walk with me a bit on this one… what is a the base root of everything?

Love?

Yes, we love teaching and we love our students, but what does that mean?

Build relationships?

Most definitely, but what does that look like?

SEL/SEAL/Mindfulness/Mental Health awareness and trauma informed?

Yes, we owe it to ourselves and our students to do that work, but how do we honour them?

Student voice/student choice?

That’s awesome they can choose projects and interests, but…

PBL, creativity, innovators mindset, global competencies, STEM, STEAM, cross-curricular…

And those we can pull in once we have the base…

Hold that thought.

Watch the waves and this time dive beneath them, deep to the ocean floor that holds the currents and tides…float on the lake, see the stars and feel the power and energy of their connection to the world around you.

What is the one thing that can help us build relationships, facilitate SEL/SEAL/Mindfulness, enable student voice/choice and truly honour our students, our love for them and teaching?

Equity.

But I do equity!

Hold that thought.

Equity. IS.

It’s not “done” in a separate lesson, project, lesson plan or event. It is the essence that connects.

Equity (intersectional equity) needs to be infused in everything, from the ground up. From each piece of information students are given, to the reading materials, to the examples we hold up, to asking whose voices are heard and whose are silenced, to the games we play, to the expectations we have, to the stigmas and stereotypes, to how we interact with each child, to breaking down our own biases/stereotypes/ablist/misogynistic/racist preconceived learned notions of the world, its history, within our own communities and within our own hearts. It means being committed to self critical examination, a willingness to see ourselves, be uncomfortable and (un)learn.

How are we building relationships based upon love and trust such that we can support students? How can we say that we are doing everything we can for our students, to honour the very essence of who each, individual child is as they present to us in that moment if we do not ground it in equity? Because then it is “equity-lite”, based on divisive and reductive lines of race, sexuality, gender, ability, mental health, socio-economic, religion or culture.

We all know the answers, because we talk about them, post about them all the time, however it’s time to move on to the next steps…the doing…take all the threads of what we want to do, imbue them with equity for all our students, and then starting knitting the net.

Hold that thought…

You always say #WalkYourTalk. So? What does that even mean?

If I’m going to look my students in the eye and say with truth, “I. See. You.” , then I need to take the opportunity I have to develop the vision I have for a program Ill be working in. I need to put my money where my mouth is, start from the ground up with EQUITY and pull the threads together from there. It’ll be a work in progress. I won’t get it perfect, because I’m still on my own journey or learning and unlearning, but that’s ok.

Drop a pebble. Watch the Ripples. Move an Ocean

You can come along and follow my journey, creating a vision for the program I’ve been dreaming of. Your insights, critical thoughts and ideas appreciated.

#WalkYourTalk

#PebbleRippleOcean

Whatcha Doing?

Pssst…Hey you…Ya…YOU…Whatcha doing?

Like right now? Hang on a sec…I’m…just…gonna…grab this…step…stool..ok, so I’m vertically challenged…and have old knees…and now #WolfPackEdChat is mocking me…

Again…

Whew…MUCH better!

That wall was a bit high.

I mean I get it. Gotta keep those inquisitive interlopers out right?

Doesn’t it get a bit stuffy in here? And hey, there’s not a ton of light…how do you actually..ouch! What was that? And ewww, I just touched…seriously…some light? You need to breathe right?

Hmm…if I just move….no, no, I got it…and fix that…seriously, work with me on this…shift this piece…good thing I brought my drill…YA IT’S A BIT NOISY!!! ALL GOOD!!! What do you mean you don’t own your own blow torch????Honestly, I haven’t set anything on fire in years…ok, just that once…but it was teensy…almost there…why are you sweating??? Here, sit down before you faint!

TADA!!!!

Feel that? It’s called fresh air.

I know, right! Look at all the space around you…beautiful isn’t it?

What? Oh, that.

You’ll get used to it. I promise.

Fresh air, and a brand new light on everything! Hmm, ok well, yes I could have warned you, and no, no one is going to notice few cobwebs. Honestly, relaaaaax!

People come to visit the people not to judge their houses sigh…

I never said anything about visitors? Are you sure? Hmmm..oops…

Well, maybe a few. Like a class or tw0…or three… or more…

Seriously. Ok, no you’re not going to have hordes and busloads at your door. No you don’t have to supervise recess for 200…really, you do not have to monitor snacks for them all…well, if you would stop looking at me like that…here…have a tissue…

You sit with your cup of tea (blech) and I’ll explain.

We were chatting on #WolfPackEdChat and were expressing our frustrations about working in vacuums, silos, with walls. Yes, yes, I know I took yours down. Pretty view no? Try putting your head there, and take nice deep breaths dear…

There are so many phenomenal educators out there, so many amazing things going on. We edu-speak about a lot of things like Creativity and Innovation and Global Competencies… yes, I did put capitals on them this time…what has this got to do with you? Yes, I was getting to that bit.

If we are to roll model these things, create the spaces and places where they can be nurtured, foster the mindset so that engagement and natural curiosity takes over, that is when the magic will happen.

No, I did not bring my wand…broom? Now that’s just…you’re going to love it!

It’s going to be collaboration and sharing and mentoring and pairing, littles and bigs, and whoever wants to show up and share.

Yes, I know I took down the walls. Told you I was going to walk my talk and blow the stale air out of the vacuum. You weren’t part of that proclamation? Apologies.

In the realm of the virtual everything, there’s no reason why a class in Alaska can’t share with a class in Florida, or a class in Ontario. With as many or as few as you choose!

It can be different grades, elementary with high school, or middles with littles, a maker and a tinker or some STEAM for that STEM. It might look like a show and share for some, but how cool would it be if some bigs and some littles, and maybe some middles took a project to pursue then peruse! How fantastically fabulous would the sharing and pairing be when bigs mentored littles and littles reminded bigs how much fun it is to learn and explore and share with delight all the ways it went right!

Do you “have” to?

Of course not! Each to their own comfort lane as they say. We’ve already got some teachers who want to play. To live stream between classes (this is not for the masses), to show and share, and maybe enter on a journey together with students from all over the world.

Sky is the limit. Full STEAM ahead…we’re taking the lid off the box, pulling down the walls, rolling out the welcome mat, inflating the bouncy castles and loading the tables up with makery things, and experiments and projects and more…

Stronger together. Because we’re awesome that’s why.

Um, no, I am not putting the walls back up.

#PebbleRippleOcean


Hold That Thought…

Feel that for moment. Sit with it.

Insert annoying elevator music here please and read the fine print.

Now, take a little detour with me if you will.

Hold that thought.

Someone once said to me, “Annie, you’re their ‘jack o all trades’ and you’re gonna have to decide if you’re gonna keep taking all they decide to toss at you”. Interesting phrasing. I hadn’t considered things in that light before. I genuinely like doing new things. I am curious by nature and passionate about exploring, learning and play. Whether dogsledding, composing, catering or comedic routines, I’m always looking for new things to learn, like coding and welding.

I’m blessed to wear a lot of hats.

I’m a mom (of two legged and four legged fascinating beings).

I’m an artist, an explorer of colour and movement. I squish paint.

I’m a maker and a creator.

I’m an educator and advocate. I teach stuff. Sometimes. Other times, I’m an explorer in a new world, a co-conspirator on an adventure and I learn as much as my students. More often than not, they will teach this dinosaur new tricks. And it’s magical.

There has been a lot of talk in edu-world, about competencies, mindsets, outcomes, how we get there, and what we should be “producing”. So many laudable minds with amazing ideas about facilitating engaged learners who approach challenges fearlessly, who think creatively and with dogged determination problem solve, fail, reevaluate, reattempt until success is found such that they are set up for success in the ever changing global market. Innovators with more STEAM than the little engine who could!

Hold that thought.

Flow. I’ll let you do your own digging into the research behind it all, both the psychology and its applications to education, but for now, consider flow to be that state of mind where your mind is so engaged that it’s almost not engaged, because you can lose track of time and one thing moves on to the next thing and there is just…this..flow. I’ve called it “the zone” when painting, or “stream of consciousness” or “intuitive” painting, because you’re not necessarily thinking, you are just doing. And I mean that in an actively engaged sense, not as a passive automaton.

Flow. The zone. It’s a pretty amazing space. Sometimes, it’s this synergy of ideas where you can build from one to the next, leap frog dancing, ever expanding, creating and innovating and…

Hold that thought.

Seriously? But I just want to try…

Hold that thought.

But what if we…

Hold

I could do this if I…

That

Can we just go and see if they have…

Thought

Feel that? The energy, the confidence, the drive, the joy, the pride, the curiosity…wind from the sails, momentum is gone, and it grinds down, dust and ashes, leaden, suffocating the essence of creativity, innovation, dreams.

Why? Because our systems are not designed for flow. In short bursts, micro tasks, I will concede. But for those magical, gravity defying leaps of imagination and courage? Where learning is a cross curricular fluid meld and colleagues collaborate such that my student’s journey becomes your student’s journey because you can facilitate this where I can facilitate that? Where my skills support this piece and your knowledge provides the key to the next lock, and a student can go from lock to lock and work the tumblers until the whole puzzle is solved and the adventure complete because we never had to tell them…

Hold that thought…

We say we want kids who take risks, who are resilient, Innovators and Makers and Creative Collaborators. But we are inherently supporting the very systems that take that natural curiosity and creativity and squeeze it out of them, breaking it down bit by bit with every pedantic worksheet, every standardized test, every time they’re given the message when the “right” answer is rewarded. Colour within the lines. There is only one way. That’s not my department. I have curriculum to teach. We don’t have time.

Creativity, mindful inquiry, project based learning and problem solving is “messy”. It is non-linear, takes time and isn’t quantifiably measured within the confines of the ministry dictated outcomes, the perfect assessment rubric you’ve been slaving over for hours that tick off those perfectly precise little boxes of creative confinement. When the system is constructed such that the expectation for educators is to teach the same materials, with the same assessments, and in some cases, at the exact same time, day by day marching in step to the beat of the drum that plays only for the convenience of covering curriculum, so that “standards” are the same, which by no means means equitable, there is no room in that perfect race of pedantic pedagogy for ” I don’t know. Let’s find out”.

I sometimes discuss things that have come up in Edu-Twitter, to get some insights, see what rings true. On creativity, one of my students said, “Miss, they crush the creativity out of us, then turn around and expect us to be creative”. And how, pray tell do you respond to that when you know, in your heart of hearts, that there is truth resonating like an alarm, a call to action? I thought of when my youngest came home from school one day with a piece of artwork he had created. It was awesome, and no, not a “mom”moment”. I was fascinated when he explained each little detail, because it was well thought out, this little magical universe. On the back? The rubric with its precise, crisp checks letting him know it was valued at a 3 (B for my southern colleagues). Why? Because the sky was purple. Because he had coloured outside his own lines. Now some will say that we have to assess things, and fair enough. However, our assessments denote value and construct systems and imbue meaning. No one asked to find out that the sky was purple at twilight with fireflies dancing over a grassy hill. Lesson learned? How confident would you have to be to risk thinking creatively the next time?

We need to start dialogues.

We need to stop asking “Why?”and start saying “Why not?”

Hold that thought.

Simplistic? Perhaps. How many boxes does it take before we stop asking, stop daring, play it safe?

Creative spark. Flow. Fluidity.

Take an idea, a jump off point and run with it.

Flow.

In the Zone.

If I do this and move that, and how about I attach this…”TICK”…but no that doesn’t works so maybe that, but…” TICK”… Got it!!!! Now, just to take it there and …”TOCK”…why can’t we go to the shop? …why…

Because when we don’t have the answers and we learn together, the adventures begin. and when I don’t have the answers but I know someone who does, then why can’t we refer to the masters of that key?

Ah, yes…silos. Or boxes. Or walls. We may have lowered them to the state of a lovely partitioned office space with neatly defined cubicles, but sunshine, a wall…is a wall…is a wall. We peek covertly over the tops, checking out what our colleagues are up to, but we work in independently isolate vacuums of protectionist profundity and guard our spaces from inconvenient, inquisitive interlopers because there is no time, priorities by assessments to scale, curriculum to deliver and a myriad of other rationales to keep our corners sharp, our test scores high, lines clean.

Hold that thought.

Two days. That was how long took them to fix my brand new cable winch which they had over cranked and jammed. I could have easily taken it back to the store. Student choice. Student voice. Success. Which builds confidence for bigger leaps. And that leads to…

Hold that thought.

Waterfalls hanging two stories high, with specifications and materials and costs…a student who was pulling 50s last year…his “flow”, his initiative. Now, he wants to build a prototype, custom make the anchors, which means welding, which means…

Hold that thought.

And that’s the message we’re giving our kids. We blast it on our announcements, create catchy mottos and slogans, and write pedagogical articles and wax poetic on podcasts. Heck, I’ll even design the t-shirts. Be INNOVATIVE. Be CREATIVE. Be daring. Grit! Don’t Quit!

But…hold that thought… We talk a phenomenal talk, but we need to get real about catch phrases and buzzwords like “Creativity” and “Innovative”, because given the assessment models and system parameters we’ve designed and are now stuck working within, given the implicit value messaging students are receiving on a daily basis, what we really mean is “creativity” and “innovative”. Little “c” creative lends itself to our system of walls with its constraints on time and the priority of curriculum download and test scores. Creative process, at the highest level, which we purport to want, takes time, is not neat linear little boxes, so the system cannot truly support it. Innovation and problem solving, true “I” Innovation while highly desired and much appreciated, often leads a student out of your course’s boundaries, to needing to be able to access the guidance and expertise of a different department, but our systems of cubicles and silos aren’t wired to facilitate that. We keep conveniently forgetting to put in the qualifier clause in fine print, “Be innovative. Be creative. BUT please keep it tidy; clean up is 10 minutes before the end of class. Keep your skies blue. Colour within the lines. Innovation stops at the end of period3. Yes, I know you want to, but hold that thought.

And it’s time to be clear and transparent about that, or change the system. Period. Paradigm switch. Put your money where your mouth is. Walk your talk. Or else, stop edu-speaking about goals we have no intention of truly supporting. Once again, we’re holding up the bright shiny object and simultaneously shackling them, boxing them in but asking them to think inside and outside the box. How about, as the adults in the room, the system generators, paradigm constructors, we get rid of the damned box?

I teach art.

I am going to build that damn waterfall. Because for a student to show that level of initiative, to dare, to risk, to be vulnerable, to dream…that student deserves to have a teacher who supports them, believes in them, who walks the talk and will make it happen. I asked them to Innovate and Create. Sky’s the limit. Show me what you got. Bring it. Now the onus is on me to be creative and innovative, to risk and think outside the box, to lean on the relationships I’ve built with colleagues to support me and help facilitate.

And while I figure out this one amazing project which brought to the forefront all the limitations and impediments to Creativity and Innovation, I’ll be looking at ways to advocate for fluidity, to allow for flow, and free range learning as opposed to the coops.

I urge you, take a closer look at the systems you’re working within. Can you truly say C and I, or is it truly c and i? Be honest. Be clear. Let’s find a way to nullify the need for that boring “hold please” music…Put your money where your mouth is. Walk your talk #PebbleRippleOcean.